All Football Names In Key & Peele's "East/West College Bowl" Sketch
Key & Peele's "East/West College Bowl" featured some truly memorable player names, and here's a list of every moniker mentioned in the sketch.
Here's a breakdown of every bizarre name featured in Key & Peele's classic "East/West College Bowl." Key & Peele is a sketch show that paired Keegan-Michael Key and Jordan Peele, with the duo proving to be perfect comic partners. The series debuted in 2012 and ran for five seasons and each episode could be relied upon to deliver at least one fantastic sketch. Skits could range from goofy movie or TV parodies to searingly political ones, and the show always gave the titular comics a chance to show off their comic range.
Any fans of Key & Peele will have their personal favorite sketches from the show, though some classics include “Ray Parker Jr. Theme Songs,” "Continental Breakfast," "Aerobics Meltdown" and "Text Message Confusion." Outside of the show, the pair starred together in 2016 comedy Keanu, which was a fun effort but also felt like a good sketch stretched out to feature-length. Their last collaboration to date was voicing Bunny and Ducky in Toy Story 4.
One of Key & Peele's early viral hits was "East/West College Bowl," where the names of college football players are read out and became gradually more outlandish and insane. It also gave Key and Peele yet another chance to show off a dizzying array of characters - and wigs - in a very short space of time. Here's a list of every name mentioned in the sketch.
East Team
- D’Marcus Williums
- T.J. Juckson
- T’Variuness King
- Tyroil Smoochie-Wallace
- D’Squarius Green, Jr.
- Ibrahim Moizoos
- Jackmerius Tacktheratrix
- D’Isiah T. Billings-Clyde
- D’Jasper Probincrux III
- Leoz Maxwell Jilliumz
- Javaris Jamar Javarison-Lamar
- Davoin Shower-Handel
- Hingle McCringleberry
- L’Carpetron Dookmarriot
- J’Dinkalage Morgoone
- Xmus Jaxon Flaxon-Waxon
West Team
- Saggitariutt Jefferspin
- D’Glester Hardunkichud
- Swirvithan L’Goodling-Splatt
- Quatro Quatro
- Ozamataz Buckshank
- Beezer Twelve Washingbeard
- Shakiraquan T.G.I.F. Carter
- X-Wing @Aliciousness
- Sequester Grundelplith M.D.
- Scoish Velociraptor Maloish
- T.J. A.J. R.J. Backslashinfourth V
- Eeee Eeeeeeeee
- Donkey Teeth
- Torque (Construction Drilling Noise) Lewith
- (The Player Formerly Known As Mousecop)
- Dan Smith
Key & Peele's "East/West College Bowl" starts with a nice comic premise and just keeps escalating from there. Names like Xmus Jaxon Flaxon-Waxon or Hingle McCringleberry are great comic monikers, but by the time it gets to X-Wing @Aliciousness or (The Player Formerly Known As Mousecop), the sketch just gets transcendent. The comic capper of Dan Smith is just icing on the cake.
Key & Peele has some recurring bits like The Valets or Peele's tragic nerd Wendell, and they later brought back "East/West College Bowl" for some sequel sketches. The original remains the best, however, and is a testament to the power of delivering a silly gag with the straightest face possible.
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